An Environment for Magic
It’s magical when vulnerable, willing people gather in a safe place to heal. It reminds me of the environment inside a fertilized egg. The conditions are just right for growth to take place. And the new life is protected from outside forces that could harm it.
I recently witnessed this magic at work. We offered a safe, quiet hospital unit away from life’s daily struggles. We provided resources and activities to promote growth and learning. And we had two groups of women staying with us who encouraged and nurtured each other.
One of the groups was a pair of young women. They both came to us with childhood trauma. Both had recently made some unfortunate decisions that jeopardized their health. Both were unhappy about the directions their lives were taking. They befriended each other, supported one another and became information sponges, soaking up all the knowledge and ideas we gave them. They blossomed under our care. The skills we offered them was the water, and our safe space the sunshine that facilitated their growth.
The other group included three women in their 50’s and 60’s. Each came with a different set of problems. One was dealing with addiction, and the other two mood disorders. They came from different walks of life and probably would never have met or crossed paths outside our facility. One encouraged the other two with positive comments. Another encouraged her peers to participate in activities. The third was a wise, reflective presence. It was symbiotic, the way bees collect nectar from flowers, but in the process, spread the flowers’ pollen to aid in reproduction. These women were not only having their own needs met by the others but also by helping them.
I feel blessed to work in an environment where these situations are possible- a place where the conditions are right for miracles to happen. It’s profound to see others take the first steps to change their life and make it worth living again.
I’m also blessed to work as a Listener Poet with The Good Listening Project. It’s another organization that creates magic. Listener Poets hold space for people in healthcare systems to share whatever’s on their mind in one-on-one listening sessions. We then write each person a custom poem. These poems are also used to facilitate meaningful conversations among colleagues.
The magic is in the listening. Of course we take great care to write beautiful poems for our poemees, but the power of the project is offering a concrete reflection of what they said, resulting in them feeling heard and understood.
Here are a couple of the poems I wrote along with their accompanying origin stories.
She’s a caregiver to her husband of 19 years. He was in a life-changing automobile accident in 2021. After 3 months in the hospital with little chance to live, he survived but is unable to speak or care for himself.
She’s seen him through many setbacks, always his advocate. “I don’t know how I’m able to do it all,” she says, referring to the caregiving tasks. “I used to be afraid of the sight of blood. But you don’t think about it. When you love and care for someone, you just do it.” They’ve settled into a new routine so she feels it’s time to find herself again.
She works in dermatology and is preparing for her last year of residency. “I’m at a point where I want to prioritize myself and it’s scary,” she said.
She suffered from depression last year. Depression brought on by 13 relatives becoming ill or losing their lives. And depression brought on by the judgment she felt while working through the grieving process.
She’s bubbly and funny. She’s a hard worker. She’s a leader, a planner, a Virgo. And she loves Whitney Houston.
Caregiver Haven is one of TGLP’s newer projects. Because of the support of generous donors, informal caregivers can sign up for a free poetry session via Zoom with a Listener Poet. These sessions are for anyone caring for a parent, spouse or child with a disability. All caregivers are welcome. Each participant will be sent a custom poem within five days of your Zoom call- no strings attached. Please pass along the information, and link below, to anyone you think would benefit from being heard and supported while they care for others.
Brene Brown is the master of vulnerability. If you haven’t seen her TED Talk yet, “The Power of Vulnerability,” you should take 20 minutes to listen. It’s an oldie but a goodie. Well worth the time.
The Cleveland Clinic offers a nice overview of depression. Check it out if you or someone in your life could benefit from some help.
Here are 5 Strategies for Being a Better Listener from The Good Life Project.
It’s unrelated to this post, but I recently discovered a beautiful Substack by Helen Stark called, “The Time Foragers’ Club.” She creates amazing visual journals. I received 5 one-month paid subscriptions to give as gifts. Check out her site and let me know if you’re interested- I’d be happy to pass them along. I’m going to try creating an artist’s notebook and would love the company.
As always, thank you for your support. Consider becoming a paid subscriber if you haven’t already and are able.
XOXO,
Geva