Cooking, an Act of Love

Suleika Jaouad sends her weekly Substack, The Isolation Journals, on Sunday mornings. I always read it in bed with a cup of coffee because it feels like the perfect way to start my day. One of her recent posts had me thinking about food and cooking in a new way. She wrote that cooking a meal at the end of the day, and gathering to share it with loved ones, is a grounding tool for her. A grounding tool, something that anchors our day, an activity that keeps us centered - I’ve never thought about cooking that way. I’ve always enjoyed preparing meals but if I’ve had a busy day or a lot of tasks to catch up on in the evening, I often skip it in lieu of something frozen, cobbled together or leftover. Honestly, some days it feels like an inconvenience.

But reading about her pleasure around cooking re-inspired me. I’ve been trying to make a point of cooking most days, even if it’s one simple meal. I’m working on viewing dinner preparation as an act of love, both for myself and those I’m cooking for. It’s working - cooking is beginning to feel creative and meaningful again.

Food actually seems to taste better when it’s prepared with love and pleasure, rather than with hurry and obligation. Preparing fresh, delicious food for someone that takes into account their blood pressure or cholesterol level, likes and dislikes, and feelings in that moment is an act of love. We often think of food and love synonymous with baked goods and sugar. Treats certainly can be gifts but honoring someone’s health is a gift, too.

The addict in me has often had a difficult relationship with food. I go through stages where I eat pretty much anything, not paying much attention to sugar or unhealthy fats. Then I’ll go through periods where I’m much more restrictive, eliminating certain foods, or tracking what I eat. The firm boundaries give me a sense of control, however, there’s rarely a healthy balance. After reading Suleika’s post I realized that, sometimes, a less than perfect meal can end up being a perfect meal in the long run.

When I’m in a more restrictive eating pattern I’ll prep meals that I deem healthy at the time. They usually lack meat, anything processed, have little fat and contain a lot of vegetables and whole grains. But there have been many instances when I’ve looked in my lunch bag and had a lack of desire for what’s in it. Ugh, whole grains and veggies again, I think. Then I run over to our workplace cafeteria to grab a grilled cheese, some nachos or another equally unhealthy meal. I realized last week that it might be better to pack something homemade and appealing with a few healthy ingredients rather than ending up with something that has no nutritional value at all. This may seem obvious to some of you, but remember, I often suffer from an all or nothing mindset around food.

As I mentioned in my last post, I’m seeking small moments of peace each day this month - and hopefully beyond as well. Coming to terms with not eating perfectly definitely brings me peace, as does taking a half hour to create something that brings joy to myself and others. Please share what you’re doing to bring peace to your days this holiday season. I’d also love to hear your thoughts on eating and cooking.

By the way, I’m a Certified Listener Poet and have created a new website to offer my custom poetry services to the world. It’s called letmewriteyouapoem.shop. You can see examples of my work and order a poem as a holiday gift if you’re so inclined.

Sending measuring cups full of peace and gratitude to each of you.

XOXO,

Geva

Paid subscribers receive one of my quick go-to recipes this week. It’s a delicious Orzo Risotto that can be adapted to whatever happens to be in your refrigerator, along with a beautiful visual to remind you to incorporate peace into your days this busy time of year. (and my eternal gratitude)

Resources

Jenny Rosenstrach’s “Dinner: A Love Story” Substack is outstanding! Lots of great recipes and food ideas.

Don’t like to cook? Check out 14 Fun Tips For People Who Can't Find the Joy in Cooking article on the Tasting Table website.

Ideas to improve your relationship with food in healthline.