There’s a psychological study that demonstrates the power of writing about an incredibly positive event from your past. The researchers found that recalling such an event on a regular basis can improve your mood. Ideally, you should write for 30 minutes per day but even two or three minutes could have a positive impact. You can write about the same event each time or choose different events - whatever floats your boat. The more senses you include, the better. Did you smell cinnamon in the kitchen? Do you remember the texture of the squid? Did you notice the fleck of paint on the linoleum floor? Was there a bird chirping outside the window?
Let me share with you one of the happiest days from my life. It was the day I first visited Kirk in his home, the day our relationship officially began. We had dated a couple times a few months before but it wasn’t a serious relationship until that day.
He lived about 40 minutes away from me in a suburb of the Twin Cities I had never visited before. The novelty was fun. I remember driving through his unique neighborhood; it had been a community of small cabins back in the early 1900s. Some of the homes still looked like cabins and others were large, new homes that replaced the cabins that used to be there. It was a developing area, but still fairly wooded. There was a lake just down the street. I appreciated the character and charm.
Carefully following his directions, (this was well before Smart Phones) I turned left onto his street and another quick left up his driveway toward the small, gray house. He was outside taking care of a few tasks. At this point in our relationship, I wasn’t sure how I felt about him. In fact, I had been hesitant to go to someone’s home I barely knew. In hindsight, I’m sure glad I did.
He was happy to see me and led me inside. He had prepared a lunch for us that consisted of a baked chicken breast topped with pineapple and cheese. It was tasty but I remember finding it funny that was all he served - no vegetable, side or dessert. We also had a glass of wine. The conversation flowed. I was enjoying his company.
It was a warm, sunny, late March day so he asked if I’d like to go for a walk around the neighborhood. It was perfect. We walked a block, down the hill to the lake. The ice on the surface of the water was beginning to disappear, a sure sign of spring. A half mile down the road we turned away from the lake toward an older home with a horse and barn on the lot. We stopped to pet the horse then wound our way around, up and down hills, past a wide variety of homes and yards with many large, mature trees. I loved it. (We ended up walking this same route hundreds of times before we moved. We always referred to it as “The Horse Route.”) Kirk stopped to pet a dog running loose around the neighborhood. That’s when I knew he was a good human.
We returned to his house and talked some more. He wasn’t ready for me to leave and I wasn’t ready to go so we drove to the video store and picked up a movie. He moved two chairs in front of the fireplace, lit a fire and we watched the movie as the sun started to set. We snuggled. It was heavenly. I can’t remember the name of the movie because I have a hard time concentrating on movies when I’m distracted. And I was distracted by him.
It was dark by the time the movie ended. He invited me to stay the night so I wouldn’t have to drive home in the dark but I decided it was best to go. I drove back to town feeling smitten. It seemed like love was possible again. And I not only liked him, I admired him. That was important this time around. I called him when I arrived home to let him know I had made it safely. We hung up and I thought, ‘I can’t wait to see him again.’
That’s my feel good story, almost 30 years later. I’m happy to report that we still have days that feel just as lovely. Writing about it floods me with oxytocin, makes me smile, and does indeed improve my mood. I encourage you to give it a try and let me know how it works for you.
For more ideas on boosting your oxytocin, visit this Healthline site.
What a lovely story~You really know how to bring the reader in with your writing! Thanks for sharing.
What a great love story.♥️